Communications and our elders

Technology has made us a different people. We text on the phone and do not communicate via our voices any more. I much prefer to talk on the phone or face to face. That way we can communicate our emotions and use our body to communicate our feelings as well. Texts are so impersonal. Those who prefer to text have their reasons as one woman said this morning on the TV, she did not have to know whether the person she was sending a text was ill or not. I found this statement rather sad.

This brings me to the way we communicate and treat our elders. In days gone by and still happening in other cultures, our elders were respected and allowed to use their talents even though they might be very old. The youngest grandchildren talked to their elders and respected them but also loved them and were loved in return. The elders played a part in family life and also community life.

There are many in the older generation who cannot or will not use mobile phones. They like to see their family and talk to them face to face. Here in the UK, at a certain age you retire from working life and then what? If you do not have a hobby or some kind of interest then you can stagnate and fall into depression. But what happens when you find your home too large to look after? So many older people are now in retirement homes which are generally very small and have little space for hobbies. Of course these places are secure and have emergency pull cords so the rest of the family feel that the older members are safe and so do not visit or worry about them so much. But the joy of sharing with family members is no longer there and for me that is an important part of life. Sharing with friends too is good and also important but as older people are we the same as the elders of other cultures? Do we get the respect that we deserve and the treatment by others that we deserve?

Many are happy in their retirement homes and enjoy the activities that go on there but others like me are frustrated by the lack of space to enjoy my hobbies and the lack of encouragement by others who think I am a bit weird! Should we be more aware of how different we, as the elders, all are? We all have something to offer to those younger than us but often this is pushed away. It is so easy and I have seen it done, to push Granny into a retirement bungalow and then forget about her. What has happened to our feelings of family and our love for them?


New growth

Although my week has been a bit fraught with a visit to the dentist and the removal of a wisdom tooth, there have been some lovely moments. The baby starlings are making a lot of noise in their nest in the eaves as their parents fly back and forth with food. The plants are growing strongly and many are flowering now. The willow has lots of leaves too.

This cycle of growth gives me hope for our world but we need to fight hard to keep our world safe and fertile. We need to look at our values, what do we really need and how do we keep these things? Is the material world more important that our natural world? How can we work together to keep our world the way we would like to see it?

I can see that many people will have a lot of soul searching to do! It is no good saying that we won’t live much longer if we are old, we need to think of the generations to come after us. What kind of legacy are we leaving them?

A short blog this week but one that I hope will make you think and after that, take action.


Values and valuing

What are values? The dictionary definition, one of them at least, is that values are a principle or standard that is worthwhile. Valuing is regarding someone or something with esteem. This topic came up earlier this week when a friend asked me if I felt valued. This gave me pause for thought. Do I expect or want or need to be valued and if so is this not my ego at work? My friend said that she valued my friendship and my support for her when she was going through some bad stuff. So this brought up other thoughts. Do we value our friends and relations and if so why do we value them? Also should we tell them we value them and why?

Maybe if we told our friends and family what we valued about them, our relationships would be much better. And on the other hand perhaps if we were told that we were valued then it would make us be better people. If you did a job well at work and your boss said how much it was appreciated then how would that make you feel? There is a lot to think about here but as usual I would love to read your thoughts.So this week I have lots of questions for you. What do you value most in your life? And why? Do you tell people you  value them? Do you value material items more than friends or family? If you had to leave your home quickly and could only take one thing with you, what would you take?


summer flowers