Trying hard

During these chaotic months of 2020 I have been trying hard to stay positive but sometimes I fail to do so. For many little has changed during the restrictive periods while for others there have been massive changes. For those who live alone and are unable to get out and about, for those tied to the house or flat especially a high rise flat and for those who are disabled in some way, then this time has brought massive changes. Trying to stay positive when all you have known is no longer there and access to much needed services is not fully available then times are really hard.

It is easy to tell people to stay positive but you have to find something to be positive about. You can be alive but not living life. There is a big difference to living life in good ways and just being alive and sitting doing nothing. I have tried to fill my days with projects of various kinds but I am running out of ideas. I have knitted a lot of toys but what do I do with them. I need to find children who would welcome a knitted to to hug and cuddle. I have been writing a bit but have done the research but not the writing up so plenty to do there. I could draw or paint but don’t feel motivated or inspired to do that either.

I spent time in the garden but that is finished for the next few months and I am in too much pain to walk far. But I feel for those who are reliant on others for their everyday needs, for help with shopping and cleaning and for social visits. It is easy to get depressed too. I find I have days when I just want to hide way and hibernate especially now the days are short. I love music but sometimes I can’t be bothered to turn on the radio or the CD player. Technology for me is old type technology! I have a computer but I find I can’t do Skype or Facetime or Zoom as it just won’t work properly on my computing stuff. But then I prefer to see people face to face in real life. I prefer phone chats to texts as they feel more personal. Maybe I am just becoming a grumpy old woman! There is a lot to learn about how we treat others during this time and in the future. Maybe we will become a caring nation of people who look after others as well as themselves.

Knowledge and understanding

These two words, knowledge and understanding have been on my mind quite a lot during the week. So what is knowledge? Knowledge is about facts, information, skills etc., that have been acquired through education or experience and it is also about being aware of things. Anybody can learn a load of facts by reading or searching the internet but facts alone don’t really mean much at all. Understanding where those facts came from and how they were made is important.

I am a great reader and I am always searching for books to read, many fiction ones but also a lot of non-fiction where I can learn about different places and things. I love to know why people made new machinery or discovered new places to visit. I want to know how things are made and how they are used. I might admire a painting but I want to know why the artist painted that particular landscape or portrait. So for me knowledge and understanding go together.

Knowledge and understanding both appear in the Druids Prayer and with them comes the word justice, but I’ll save justice for another time. But there is a different kind of knowledge that we have, an inner knowledge or knowing when things are right or wrong. Some months ago I was asked a question and I answered but was then asked how did I know. I just know was my response. Deep inside there is another form of knowledge which may come from the past or from other sources as yet unknown.

For many years I knew about auras and how they could be sensed and seen but it is only recently in terms of science, that this kind of thing is becoming fully understood. I always knew about the effect of different colours on my feelings but science took time to work that out. Sometimes I feel that science is now confirming much of what I have known for years but where did my knowledge come from? It came from this inner knowing. What are your thoughts on inner knowing?

Are you ready?

There are many changes ahead. Every day has changes in it, some tiny changes and sometimes a large change. As we near the end of the year and a new year appears, I see that 2021 is a number 5 year in numerology. So what lies ahead? One definition I found states this; ‘THE 5 YEAR is a journey of freedom, change, adventure, new experience, and learning from mistakes. … This year will be quite an experience for you – a new experience. You now stand at the halfway point of an entire nine-year cycle of your life. The first four years are behind you.’

Make of this what you will but change is definitely on the way. So much has happened this year, a lot of it has restricted us in many ways and our freedom to do what we want has not been there. Hopefully the pandemic will soon go away and we can regain our liberties although many of us will have changed our priorities in our lives. Those of us who have done some deep thinking may have realised what is most important in our lives. Some words come to mind, respect, compassion, love, peace, understanding, support for others, healing, etc.

The changes ahead may be bumpy at times but we can believe that it will all be for the good. Positive thought is important too. You get what you think about. The power of positive thought is well known so stay positive, know that the changes that come will eventually be for the better and the whole world will benefit. Above all, have respect for others, compassion for those less fortunate and remember that we are all equal in the eyes of our creator and we are all a part of the Divine.

Time and numbers – a few random thoughts

Our ancient ones used the sunrise and sunset as to tell what time of day it was but now we have clocks and a calendar. However time seems to speed up when you are busy and slow down when you are relaxing. Or is that just my thoughts? Some days pass quickly too while others seem to go on for ever but overall I feel that time is going faster. This year of 2020 has gone by far too fast for my liking yet some days seem to go by very slowly. Of course in the spirit world time has no meaning at all and I sometimes wonder which world I am living in. The other thing I find difficult is the calendar of 12 months when we have 13 full moons each year. It would be so much simpler to have 13 months too, each one the same length. In the 1500s or maybe the 1600s the first day of the year was in April which gives family historians a lot of problems when working with parish registers and then it was changed so the first day of the year moved to 1st January. So things can be changed.

I have always been fascinated with numbers and did a lot of numerology at one time but now I just think about numbers in a different way. I do notice the numbers that seem special like 11, 22 33 and other numbers which are special to me like 9 and 5. Yesterday I was thinking about the length of time we have had restrictions applied to our lives because of the pandemic and it seemed to be around 8 months. That made me think about pregnancy and new birth. Will something happen when we reach the 9 months of restrictions, something that brings great change?

My inner sensing feels that this could just be. We as a human race, need something to happen to change our world to a much better one. I have noticed more earthquakes and some really dire weather around the world. Is this a message from Mother Earth? Earthquakes often occur around the Full Moon as I have noticed. Are them more connections with the passage of the moon?

November is the 11th month of the year so maybe this month will bring great changes of some kind. Of course you can play with numbers for hours making them into something that gives you support for your ideas but numbers are fascinating and I know many who use them every day in their planning.