Conforming and pleasing others

I’ve never been one to conform much to my parents despair. I was the tomboy and hated it when I had to stay clean and wear my best clothes. Once I had a bike then I got worse. I loved to spend time repairing it and oiling the chain. Then jeans arrived on the clothes scene. By then I was about seventeen and working. But my bike then had a crossbar as I was an ardent cyclist and rode with a cycling club at the weekends. I used my bike to get everywhere as well. You couldn’t buy jeans for ladies so I had a pair of men’s jeans. If I was out on my bike and saw my mother she turned away from me as if she did not know me.

Once I was teaching in schools I had to wear skirts and dresses as trousers for women were not allowed. I used to change into a skirt in the staff toilets as I used my bike to get to work. Then things changed so I was fine. But even now I see places of employment where uniforms are part of the job and in some cases this can be important. School uniforms of course were there when I was young and I had to conform in many ways but now the younger ones seem to wear the same kind of clothes when out of school so that it becomes a different kind of uniform. Do they all really want to look the same?

Now I am old I wear what I want when I want and have my hair in a style I like. I am growing it at the moment so it can look a bit wild but so what, can I not be who I am at my age! This brings me to the thing about pleasing others. Should we wear what others think we should wear just to please them? I am sure that we have all come across the scenario when a loved one asks us to wear something they like but that we don’t, because if we loved them we would do that little thing for them.  For many years now I have had the strength to say to others that if they don’t like what I wear, how I have my hair done or what I do, then tough, that is their problem not mine. It is important to be true to yourself and it is who you are and what you do and say that is important not what you wear.

If I want to dress up for an occasion then I will do so but what I wear then maybe not what you think I should wear but it is my choice and I am being true to myself. I love to wear tie dyed stuff and velvet and can look a bit wild but that is the gypsy in my soul and she won’t be sat on and made to conform. Do you conform or do you stay true to yourself?

The photo is an old one. I am at the back on my bike. I was about seventeen or eighteen then.




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